Being content

Every where we look we are being given advice on diet, exercise and how to avoid stress. The secret to healthy mind and body is partly to be content and grateful. respect yourself and your own wellbeing and then you are of course better placed to help others.

A great deal of the success and longevity of the older generations has been, I was told today,was that they didn’t have great expectations and were more content with what they had. Definitely some truth in that, material things are not important we just get tricked into thinking we must have the lastest gadget, phone or accessory.

I remember somebody saying ‘the younger generation know the price of everything and the value of nothing’  -this all sounds very cynical and negative but to a certain degree this is also true and we must all take some responsibility for that too.

Being mindful and grateful on a day to day basis calms the mind and in turn helps us to achieve more and in a more orderly and productive manner. We place ourselves under personal stress by taking on too much we just don’t always realise it.

 

Bereavement is a painful journey

At my age I am surrounded by friends and extended family members who are sadly losing parents and other elderly relatives and friends. On the positive side people are living longer although the end of their life may then be challenging with health issues.

As I reminded a lovely close friend today;  however difficult it is we mustn’t allow grief to consume us but try to remind ourselves of positive aspects of our loved one’s life and character. Moreover remember to be grateful for the small things in our own lives that daily we too often take for granted.

As any good publication or article on mindfulness will suggest take time to enjoy even the simplest of activities whether that be doing the crossword, drinking your coffee or savouring that last square of chocolate. Doing something for you is not selfish it’s self-preservation.

The fast pace of life and the technological world in which we live keep us racing through life rather than living it to its best. As I also reminded a young working mother earlier today: Our crazy schedule is actually within our control if we so choose…and breathe easy.

 

Keep signing

Thank you to all my friends and colleagues who found time to sign the OPA’s petition yesterday. Please keep signing and circulate if you feel able to support.

Never under-estimate what we the people can do when we join hands and make those in power listen.

Preventative rather than cure especially in health is a no-brainer and can help reduce the NHS ever increasing costs.

Cat comfort

I often write on my blog about pet bereavement but today I would like to promote the value of owning and loving a pet. Cats and dogs provide great friendship, unconditional love and often bring a sense of calm into a family unit. I know my own feline friends always sense when I am either upset or unwell. It is proven statistically that owning and stroking a pet helps lower blood pressure and they are great companions for the elderly especially those that live on their own.

There have been many books written about the magical relationships cats have brought to residential home residents. Indeed when inspecting and viewing a series of homes for the elderly recently, I was very taken with one small unit which had its own resident moggy.

Additionally, those people that have dogs and walk them not only keep their pets healthy, get regular exercise themselves but also maintain contact with their local community which increases their wellbeing.

Cat and dog homes are often full to bursting and giving a home to an unwanted animal can bring great joy into their new owner’s life. Let’s not forget the great work all the working dogs do in helping those with disabilities often giving back independence.

 

Changing times

Today I discussed with a colleague how times had changed within education. We spoke about how previously teachers could hit children with a cane, throw black board rubbers at their heads and even wash their mouths out with soap for swearing.The latter I witnessed myself… I kid you not!

Thankfully we have come a long way and teachers are better behaved and hopefully so are the children. My colleague was in her 80’s and interested to learn about safeguarding and how staff are not meant to be ‘touching’ children -and those of us who have had safeguarding training know that even when administering first aid one has to be mindful and only act appropriately.

Equally teachers are now coping with far more stress factors than in our day at school aside of  league tables; drugs, self-harming and of course cyber-bullying not all changes are for the better and life is not easy for our teenagers. The opportunities are vast but the pressures are too.

The main advice is to keep an open communication line and take an active interest in one’s children not just their friendship groups but their well-being too. Parenting the most rewarding yet difficult assignment you will ever be given.

Memories

Aside of my various writing projects wherein I often talk about keeping loved ones alive in our hearts when talking about bereavement I believe it is vital to celebrate the life of those we lose.

Whilst feeling sad at the passing of a loved one it really does help the grieving process to remember the  funny times and their personal achievements rather than focus on the way they died. As I have shared personally many times my mother’s life wasn’t cancer and I have always preferred to recall the many gifts she gave us her love, her time and her wisdom.

Many people also find comfort in preparing a memory board of photographs to look at, reflect and hold onto positive memories.

Where ever you are in your own bereavement journey remember your loved one would want you to go on living your life to the full.

What we cannot see

I sincerely hope our Prime Minister’s intentions to increase budgets for mental health assistance within the NHS and the Education sector comes to fruition. Sadly the things we cannot see are often dissmissed.

I was reminded today on an early morning walk as I approached a rather dense bush which was concealing a number of birds vocalising loudly… I couldn’t see them but they were there. This can be true of people in need of help with emotional problems they are struggling to overcome. If one has a leg in plaster or anything visual we automatically find people engaging and giving us sympathy.

I make a point of asking if somebody is ok whether they have a leg in plaster or not and I am mindful that people that either haven’t had children and/or their’s grew up in a different time seem indifferent to the stress of our teens today. It’s tough, the pace of life and expectations is great and with the added pressure of exams and continuing increase of cyber bullying and self-harming ..they need our help and support not our criticisms.

 

OUR PERSONAL DREAMS

The dreams we have are so important to us even if at times we shelve them as life gets in the way of our personal ambitions..but they will come back to haunt us and remind us not to give up on them.

A few quotes to treasure:-

‘But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet, tread softly because you tread on my dreams.’

W B Yeats.

‘The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams’

Eleanor Roosevelt

It’s never too late to follow your dreams…

 

 

A tidier start to 2017

I always have a bit of a tidy up and de-clutter at the end of the year/beginning a new one but have to confess boy am I in need of it this time round!

Whilst spending my time gaining various qualifications as a mature student and researching and writing my various projects I have allowed the home office to become a sea of files and oh so useful papers.

A family member, an estate agent, stayed over xmas and suggested a de-clutter was called for. He advised me that my ‘homely’ look was in fact just untidy! So in readiness of filling all the storage boxes I have ordered I started a bit of rationalising it all today and found a book on de-cluttering under a pile of stuff! Now that one could not make up..but it certainly made my best buddy and life coach pal laugh.

Magazines are always full of tips to de-clutter and organise our lives at the strat of a new year and we all start off with good intentions..this year I am going to apply the NLP techniques I know on myself and streamline.

It doesn’t come easy to me with an approach of ‘handy if you never use it’ and I know I am not alone as a child of parents from the second world war and the time of rationing that we have a tendancy to hoard things.

It seems many of us have far too many things and not enough storage so something has to give. But I just can’t part with books, even with my own books published on Kindle one can’t beat a real book…the older the better.

True reflection of society

I know that many of the writers for soaps will feel justified in their story lines as being a true reflection of today’s society…if this is the case for last night’s Eastenders then things have become very dark. In just one episode we saw attempted suicide, self-harming and drug abuse. Sadly these are all things which many people  are struggling to control.

I often write about suicide on my blog especially in young men which is where the large proportion of stats lay. I am not therefore criticising the soap writers but all credit to them for being brave enough to tackle these issues albeit it sad viewing.

I am a great advocate in awareness of any type rather than for the troubles facing the young remaining taboo.We ignore them at our own peril.

However, I would like to see our young feeling happier about their life and  focusing on the opportunities that present themselves rather than being dragged down by what they may feel are their failings..more often than not people in depression just need to talk and feel heard.

My blog message today is cherish those around you and if a family member needs help then encourage them to get it, don’t leave them struggling. Life is good but sometimes in the rush of life we just get lost along the way and simply forget.

I wish all my fellow bloggers and followers a very healthy and happy new year and if financial rewards come too all well and good.

For those who have had a difficult 2016 I say go all out in 2017, follow your dreams and kick some butt! Have fun and remember laughing is as good as a tonic and for those that like the occasional Gin add in a measure of that too!