elderly

Christmas Tree Festival

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For my local followers just reminding you all to find time to visit St Saviour’s St Albans Xmas Tree Festival which starts Saturday 16th opening at 12.00.

This is a beautiful event held at one of my favourite local churches entrance is free but donations are welcome. From the 16th -23rd there will be a number of events held with something for everyone and all ages. The Cafe is open all week until 4.30 daily. Aside of the various day time activities and craft fair please check for services on their website http://www.ssaviours.org

The wonderful display of trees is all sponsored and decorated by local charities and organisations. This year my own tree (jointly sponsored with Visual Merchandising) is to help raise awareness for Dementia and the Alzheimer’s Society, so if you manage to get along you will find our tree in the Lady chapel.

 

St Saviours Christmas Tree Festival

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St Saviours Church in St Albans are once again holding their Christmas Tree Festival starting 16th of December and running until 23rd.  Entry is free but donations are of course welcome.

Every day there are attractions for all ages including film shows and musical events with a craft fair and cafe open until 4.30 throughout the week. Full details of services are on their website:

http://www.ssaviours.org.

This year my own tree is to help with awareness for Dementia and the Alzheimer’s Society. If you visit please come and see my tree in the Lady Chapel promoting;-

love kindness and understanding.

Kindness and time

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My own mentor and amazing mother always used to say the best gift we can give is our time. As we approach the Christmas period we should be mindful of those that live alone or maybe have lost a loved one with year. The first Christmas may be the hardest the family will have to face.  I have always maintained that Christmas time can place huge pressures on people to be happy when actually they may be feeling sad for many reasons.

What we can all do is to make an effort to give our time when we can spare it and of course show a bit of kindness to those that would really appreciate the sentiment perhaps more so this year.

Speaking this week with a close friend we were both in agreement that those who are bereft need our consideration long after the funeral week…but perhaps we are all guilty of forgetting that at times.

Remember life goes by quickly but kindness on the other hand lasts for ever.

If you are feeling the pain of those who are missing try and remember the happy times you shared or a funny experience and keep their memory alive in a positive way as best you can.

 

World Kindness Day

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So I am reliable informed is World Kindness Day and for most of us this is a daily act and for others they may have to work a bit harder. I often write about kindness and how it is a strength and so easy to apply. If we are kind in our thoughts, deeds and actions, in my experience it is returned back to us.

To have that friend you have to be that friend as one of my favourite gurus once said.

This year I am sponsoring a tree again with Sarah Manning at St Saviours Tree Festival in St Albans with a theme of ‘love, kindness and understanding‘ in support of dementia awareness for the Alzheimers Society. Our tree will be in the Lady Chapel this time and we are thrilled. The festival has something for everyone, entry free but donations are welcome.

The festival starts on Saturday 16th December running daily until 23rd December. Please visit their website http://www.ssaviours.org for full details and carol services.

Love and protect the elderly

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Now I know the world has gone completely mad. I am not one to shy away from technology and as my amazing mother used to say ‘don’t be beaten by man nor machine.‘ But, seriously, my lovely fellow bloggers and followers  do we really want robots looking after our elderly?

I work with clients with dementia and their families with some friends contemplating and facing putting their parents into nursing homes for various health reasons. The idea that they will be put in a room with a robot is crazy if not cruel.

Having visited various nursing homes what the residents need is the personal touch and social interaction to keep their spirits up and help fight loneliness. It is a huge and difficult period of adjustment when somebody leaves their family home to move into a nursing home. I’m sorry but a robot cannot monitor the wellbeing of humans.

These private nursing homes are making a fortune with many paying staff low wages and expecting a lot of the entertainment and other facilities to be met by volunteers. The idea they will save money by investing in robots just shows the mentality of what we are dealing with. It’s obvious a real case of business not personal care!

Many people approaching the age/stage of life to end up in a nursing home will be like me and think of robots as the cybermen from Dr Who or the classic series The Avengers of the 60’s and that is neither funny nor a entertaining thought.

Why can’t we be like other countries who value, respect and provide proper care for the elderly? The generation, in many cases who have fought for their country giving a huge chunk of their early lives in the process. What a great thank you…I am spitting feathers today I kid you not.

 

Dementia support

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For those relatives and carers dealing with loved ones diagnosed with Dementia there is help and support available. Sadly local doctors surgeries cannot possibly display material for every illness condition and there are different kinds of dementia and everyone’s dementia is different too.

The Alzheimer’s Society have a great selection of leaflets which will help you deal with all aspects of change you are having to face and the quality of the content of their publications is excellent. Their leaflets are free to download or receive in hard copy format. Please visit their website http://www.alzheimers.org.uk

**Ebooks are also available visit: http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/ebooks

 

Change is good

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We all struggle at times with change but change is not all bad or is it? Yesterday I was tempted, like many little girls…at the checkout to buy a toffee apple. But…toffee apples are a different colour than from my day when the toffee was brown and made by the local green grocer -now it is a hysterical red colour??? Too many additives me thinks and, so did the lady similar age to me at said checkout.

OK what do we do in these circumstances when we want to be healthy? I went for the chocolate covered apple instead…of course. I really enjoyed this after an afternoon of bereavement befriending. The apple in side was pretty darn good too.

We have to live and we have to embrace change though sadly in life the decisions are more difficult than deciding on what naughty treat to eat.

Have a good day fellow bloggers, followers and toffee apple eaters!

Distraction techniques

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Throughout life most of us at one time or another will be in a position with either those we love and/or those we work with are in need of a positive distraction.

Even the most positive of souls can feel flat and I count myself in that category. At times we may be missing people, those who are no longer with us and even those who may have just moved away perhaps to university, or because of a job or home relocation.

Today would have been my own mentor’s birthday so I send out a happy birthday wish mum out into the universe. I will distract myself with work and meeting up with positive colleagues.

Working with dementia clients they too have their days when they feel ‘out of sorts’ and there are many ways in which we  can help either as counsellors or family members to help focus them on something they either enjoy or at least can be a positive interaction activity.

Similarly, distraction techniques work well with children, I know my mother practised this parenting skill with us as children. I utilised this myself recently when helping a family with small children –one is always mindful that when parents leave the house the children need to feel, happy safe and of course engaged.  A simple game of cards including all children soon brought an opportunity to engage, have fun and for me to get to know the children’s individual characters. (If I am honest working with younger children this week helped me with my own feelings relating to empty nest!)

As with adults, children will become sad at times…using being bored as an excuse when really what they crave it not just your loving attention but engagement.

Keeping occupied helps prevents those flat moments from taking over…and finally of course, laughter the best therapy of all.

Keep smiling fellow bloggers and followers.

Feeling older…not uplifted!

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As a regular blogger somehow this week I have been off air, with a collection of various articles in mind which would normally spur me on to write about my usual pet subjects…I was distracted by a Sunday supplement.

Lordy how I wish I had controlled my urge and left said mag closed. Inside were I am certain a collection of items of interest to those over 55! However, I found myself consumed by three: a stair lift, a face lift…and could I give my heart to a greyhound?

Feeling much older that when I started…soh barely in tact I will be honest much much older friends have said ‘the stairlift was a life saver’, I don’t know anybody close to me that has had/or maybe confessed to ever having a face lift…. Being single at this precise moment (chatting ysterday to a fellow single female friend) we both agreed maybe we should dip our toe back in the dating pool! Daunting as the dating arena may seem I really thought I would probably end up with some ‘old goat’ not a retired greyhound!

Seriously, I can strongly recommend adopting a retired greyhound as they make excellent pets…I cannot, however, say the same for ‘old goats’ (I mean grumpy gentlemen of a certain age) not the cute animals we see and love in petting zoos!

Think next Sunday I will stick to doing the crossword! Reverting back to the mag there was a useful shoe rack…. obviously for men and not girlies with 40 odd pairs!

Positive healing

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Some years ago I attended a patient recovery meeting held at my local hospital. The staff and speakers made it quite clear that the ratio for recovery lies 20% with surgeon and 80% with patient. I will clarify by saying it was said with regards to hip and knee operations but I know it applies to far more and not just in terms of operation recovery.

If exercise is part of the recovery journey then we must do it, if rest is recommended for other treatment then we should take heed too. However, I am in no doubt, and due to own personal experience, that positive healing comes from within and how we use our mind to heal the mind and the body is vital.

Positive healing may come to us via those that love us and help us when we are suffering physically or mentally, and, the medical experts… not forgetting our wonderful nurses who tend to our practical and emotional needs when in hospital. Often a few kind words and positive approach will register far more than the pain killers.

Over the past ten years plus I have had amazing support and treatment from a London hospital and my specialist has an incredible positive presence. A few minutes of speaking with him one feels better, based on trust, his expertise and his approach to his patients.

When we are ill we are all at our most vulnerable and that is when we really truly appreciate how we are treated and supported. However, the most important person in our endeavours to be well and strong is of course ourselves. Applying mindfulness, being positive, but realistic in our step at a time recovery will enable us to achieve our goal.

Keeping fit and positive in mind will always help us to recover from any illness or help us come to terms with any limitations that illness may bring, it should be preventative rather than cure. However, if we are struggling it is better to be honest and talk to those that can help…but only if they know.

A Dr  uttered a few simple words to me once ‘you will get through this‘ and he was right I did. But his faith and positivity have never been forgotten.