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True reflection of society

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I know that many of the writers for soaps will feel justified in their story lines as being a true reflection of today’s society…if this is the case for last night’s Eastenders then things have become very dark. In just one episode we saw attempted suicide, self-harming and drug abuse. Sadly these are all things which many people  are struggling to control.

I often write about suicide on my blog especially in young men which is where the large proportion of stats lay. I am not therefore criticising the soap writers but all credit to them for being brave enough to tackle these issues albeit it sad viewing.

I am a great advocate in awareness of any type rather than for the troubles facing the young remaining taboo.We ignore them at our own peril.

However, I would like to see our young feeling happier about their life and  focusing on the opportunities that present themselves rather than being dragged down by what they may feel are their failings..more often than not people in depression just need to talk and feel heard.

My blog message today is cherish those around you and if a family member needs help then encourage them to get it, don’t leave them struggling. Life is good but sometimes in the rush of life we just get lost along the way and simply forget.

I wish all my fellow bloggers and followers a very healthy and happy new year and if financial rewards come too all well and good.

For those who have had a difficult 2016 I say go all out in 2017, follow your dreams and kick some butt! Have fun and remember laughing is as good as a tonic and for those that like the occasional Gin add in a measure of that too!

 

 

Collateral Beauty

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Yesterday I went to see ‘Collateral Beauty’ what a beautiful film and Will Smith’s portrayal of a grieving father was amazing and so emotive.

For anybody that has lost somebody dear, especially a child, will resonate with this movie. For those who are really struggling in coming to terms with the loss of a loved one the film’s message to remember the ‘collateral beauty’ is sound advice. We are all much more than we appear, we touch people’s lives in so many ways and that love and our memories continue to keep our loved ones alive in our hearts and minds.

It is never a case of getting over a loss more attempting to come to terms and accept and that takes as long as it takes and everybody’s journey is different.

If you know anybody that has lost somebody this year remember them at this time of the year as they face various anniversaries and days where pressure to be happy is nearon impossible.Behind the painted smile…

Love and appreciate those you hold dear now whilst they are around and most of all forgive and be grateful.

 

Being grateful

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It’s been the longest time that I have been away from my blog as I decided on a few days reduced technology. Instead I have focused on my chocolate eating…

I have been extremely fortunate in being surrounded by those I love this Christmas and received some truly fab gifts. Including a mug saying ‘silly old woman’..yep that’s me! Like many families we have had our difficulties to overcome even over the festive period but we managed to set those aside and enjoy each other’s company and be grateful for all that we have rather than focus on what isn’t going right – as that’s life.

This year we have had one or two unusual presents enter our home though being slightly crazy and very quirky my ones were well received! I won’t mention the really odd gift which strangely enough has been a great sense of intrique and amusement to one and all. Laughter is of course the best tonic and we are never short of that in our house mainly at my expense as my beautiful daughter thinks I am a bit wierd…

To said daughter who sometimes reads my blog I am sending heart felt wishes for a very Happy Birthday and may all your dreams and desires come true. I am prouder than words can ever say..you are indeed my best project ever.

As my own Mother used to say:

‘I love every hair on your head and there are too many to count’

CAPTURING CHILDREN’S INTEREST

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Get them reading and visiting the theatre whilst they are young…

Earlier this week I attended a talk on the history of pantomime and we discussed how taking our children to Panto may indeed be the first experience they have of attending a theatre.Such a shame the ‘elf and safety/fun Police’ stopped sweeties from being thrown into the audience.

It is never too earlier to introduce children into live theatre or musical events. I remember taking my own daughter and friends to the panto and local am dram shows and they always enjoyed the magical experience. When our children were studying for exams with ‘An Inspector calls’ as one of their books on the reading list –  an afternoon at the theatre to see the production on stage was a great help to the students in understanding the plot.

Actor Simon Callow is quoted in a daily today revealing it was his Grandmother who introduced him to ‘The Pickwick Papers‘ age just 13. So inspiring your child this way you may just be raising the next great actor as well.

Not sprouts! Yuk

On a Christmas inspired note… ‘The Daily Mail’ reports that brussel sprouts…yes that children’s favourite are indeed healthy for not just the body but the mind too. University research is being conducted into vegetables rich from vitamin A – could well be a positive element in the fight to find cures for Alzheimer’s. Here’s hoping the proposed trials prove fruitful.

Play nicely over Christmas fellow bloggers and followers and don’t over indulge too much..except perhaps on the vegetables.

Think of the mothers

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Mothers hold the family together throughout the year, multi-task all day long every day and leading up to Christmas alongside their usual duties they have to organise Christmas as well.

I felt for a Mother in the supermarket today as she struggled to get control using her best negotiating skills with two boys under ten. Having no luck whatsoever, I was impressed to see her make them both take their sweets back ‘as they didn’t deserve them’. Well done.

The job of a peacemaker isn’t an easy one at the best of times and don’t children know how to press one’s buttons just when you would rather they didn’t.

So, think of the mothers and all that they do, be nice, be thoughtful and for God sake just behave…for once!

Christmas isn’t just about what you get it is what you give and time, understanding and patience are sometimes the best options and don’t cost a penny!

Remember your mum is likely to be the best friend you ever have.

Winding down the year

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In the midst of wondering whether there is anybody important we have forgotten to buy for, or any elderly relative or friend we have forgotten to find time to visit many of us will be winding down the year in the lead up to Christmas.

Often as one year closes and another starts many of us start a little bit of emotional spring cleaning…and a jolly good job too. I  am mindful that 2016 has been a challenge for many and it may difficult to summon up enthusiasm for next year.

However, concentrating on what we have achieved as opposed to the disasters we may have had to overcome is the best way to put a little spring into one’s step and look at the ‘still to do list’ with a fresh and positive pair of eyes. A few mulled wines may help this.

Seriously, and personally, a lot of my projects have not gone quite according to plan and/or the optimistic time schedule..but hey ho not all is lost there’s always next year. I am a great believer that delays happen for some good reason which will become crystal clear one day.

My tip for today is to not allow the pressure of Christmas nor the over indulging to allow ourselves to feel lethargic and worn out emotionally. Instead enjoy the Christmas festivities, rec-charge the batteries and skip into the new year.

Remember realistically  we can only ever live a day at a time so make it count.

Wow I’m positive for a Monday..maybe it’s because my visits to the elderly today have reminded me how stoic and amazing many of that generation are..they put the younger generations to shame in how they bounce back against all odds.

Thank God for engineers

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Last night I watched the amazing ‘The Big Life Fix’ on BBC 2. Having worked with stroke patients I was so moved and impressed with the technology advancements and dedication of the engineers featured on this brilliant show as a team of engineers helped research and design tools to help a man with locked in syndrome improving his ability to communicate with his loved ones.

They also designed a fantastic bike for a young boy with disabilities enhancing his life beyond his dreams. They even managed to outwit sheep rustlers with great ideas for tagging sheep and narrowing down the opportunities for the farmers to lose their sheep to these crooks.

Can’t wait for next week’s show.

Following dreams

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Had an interesting chat today with a young man in a supermarket who had decided not to go on to university but to have some fun for a while whilst he decided what to do.

I hear this a lot, and I am mindful that so much pressure is put on our teenagers to decide their chosen career path long before they are really ready. It’s of course great for those students who have always known what it is they want to do, have the ability and apply themselves well to follow that dream.

As I often say not all children can be academic but that doesn’t mean they should be written off, they are of course beautiful in their own way..so nurture and encourage until they do identify their dream. Meanwhile they can get on enhancing those all too valuable social skills.

It’s never ever too late to learn, speaking as a mature student I know that’s true.

The magic of Christmas

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I had an interesting chat with a client today about how magical it is when our children believe in that man with the red and white outfit, chubby red face and white beard.

I know a family member had been concerned that there was no chimney for him to get down so how would his presents be delivered? Now that’s a darn good question from a child who has seriously thought things through. All joking apart it is a sad day, when it comes, when they realise the tooth fairy is really mum and that Father Christmas is dad dressed up.

I remember one year hiding presents in a neighbour’s house and ‘Dad’ going to collect them ready for Christmas morning, it had been snowing so subsequently there was a trail of foot prints to the door. My daughter was very excited when she saw these and that Father Christmas had indeed been…and left gifts.

Trying to keep the child within us alive becomes more difficult as we grow up but remembering those halycon days brings back that warm feeling.

I recall my last Christmas before my father died and how my mum had let me have a sneaky peek at my dolls house. I can smell that turkey cooking and if I close my eyes I can see mum having her glass of sherry as she busily prepared for the madness that was Christmas with five children.

The drinks of that era were of course babycham, snowballs and for dad it was whisky and ginger. The chocolate decorations on the tree were really brilliant in those days too, umbrellas, watches and little slithers of chocolate tied up as parcels. Anybody remember the liquorice novelties?

Teenage stress

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I watched an interesting yet emotive  documentary on TV last week reporting on two teenage girls who tragically self-harmed. There is always a root problem for why girls are self-harming, which may not be obvious even to the most diligent of parents.

As usual I took copious notes but was moved and focused by  ‘a experts’ view on what is causing stress amongst teenagers. He said quite succintly:-

‘Teenagers are a mirror of society and society is in distress’

We can of course view this as negative but ignoring the facts won’t help teens of today. The pace of life is faster and great pressure is put on them to succeed. For all their advantages and amazing technology at the touch of finger they are not happy. Indeed technolog,y as I often write, brings new ways of being bullied and is responsible for lower self-esteem particularly in girls.

Keep the lines of communication open with this troubled generation they need our support and understanding more than most of us realise.