Making the right choices

Sometimes in life we are faced with making a difficult decision and after a lot of soul searching and balancing up the negatives and positive we may still be left in a bit of a quandary as to what to do. Are we making the wrong choices for the right reasons and is our reason big enough?

Discussing weighing up the benefits of ‘getting experience’ with a colleague earlier today we touched on how certain sectors are quite unprofessional and small minded in their approach and maybe without realising can be quite offensive in questioning one’s skills and abilities.

We both agreed that the minute one starts to justify one’s skills the battle is lost, though of course we have to make allowance for ‘the other man’ maybe not fully understanding the high calibre of staff they are talking to nor respecting their CV and qualifications quite as much as they should do.

This situation and the question on being ‘ over qualified’ and whether one should dumb down one’s CV is one often run past me by colleagues wondering what to do for the best in searching for that dream job/project in their advancing years.

There are a lot of people who truly do not value self-development as much as those of us mature students who spend many hours gaining extra qualifications with a continual hunger for learning.

This week I am faced with making a few myself..and I am deliberating..time for cuppa and a choccy digestive – easy decision for me!

 

Stimulating memories

As part of my own on=going research into Alzheimer’s and Dementia I am reading through a colleague’s copy of an excellent toolkit to help understand and prevent..in theory some of the symptoms and challenges those who suffer are meeting daily.

Yesterday, I decided to re-watch ‘ The Notebook‘ a beautiful love story about a husband’s dedication to help his wife through living with dementia. It is a well-loved and well-know creative piece and a weepie.

The husband never gives up on his wife and much to the disbelief of doctors she can play some music from memory. One line that always sticks with me (said emotively by the husband played by James Garner) in defence of his faith in her ability to remember and in defiance of the medics:-

‘Science only goes so far…then comes God’

In my own work wth dementia clients music is a great trigger for stimulating memories and encouraging a silent sufferer to beceome more vocal and happier.

Mindfulness living in the moment

I suspect December is a typical month where many of us will feel we do not have time to live in the moment, but it is really a question of making time. We all take the little things for granted being lost in the huge marketing campaign that is thrusted upon us from late summer it seems nowadays.

Christmas should be about appreciating those we love and spending time with them rather than our money. Don’t get me wrong I have spent many years working within the marketing environments but we seem to have lost our way somewhat.

Love is one sure way of remembering being in the moment as at the time of feeling love as humans we are surely at our very best.

So the gift for Christmas should be love and for those of us with big hearts our ‘bank account ‘never runs out.

For some it takes the loss of a loved one to realise what life is all about and readjust where we can the balance of work and play.

 

Jumping for no reason

Today I stood next to a youngmother and a toddler son who was jumping literally for joy for no reason. Such a beautiful child and I joked with his parent how great it is when we just jump for no reason. I went on to ask her I wonder what age it is we stop jumping like that for pleasure? Maybe when we are old enough to start to worry about life.

I have embarrassed my daughter before now skipping down the road and obviously not acting my age or my worry list!

Let’s all make more of an effort to jump up and down just because we can…one way of beating today’s icy cold weather and getting the blood circulating.

Remembering loved ones

The past few months have been extremely emotive for many relatives and friends in my circle. There’s always such a pressure at Christmas to be happy, when perhaps one is not. Samaritans are bringing awareness to this fact today confirming that such a large percentage of us are sad at Christmas but do things to make others happy.

We all cope with our emotions in our own way and life is constantly busy which sometimes prevents people from releasing maybe their grief openly. As I remind people going through bereavement there are no rules, or schedule or one size fits all.

However, we should all be able to grieve the way we want to, privately if that’s what we prefer and remembering those we have loved and lost in a way we feel is appropriate to respect that person and in our own way.

We can go many months moving forward and suddenly something will trigger a memory and we will feel the loss again, this may be a song, or a smell or a nonsensical memory. If this trigger makes us cry it’s no bad thing either these controlled emotions need to be released. Hanging on to emotions only leads to stress related illness or sleepless nights.

My message today is talk to people about how you feel and remember nobody has the right to dictate to others how they choose to grieve. Finally, remember that those we love and have lost would want us to go on living and loving as that’s the best tribute to their memory. We keep them alive in our hearts and that’s all anyone can expect.

Working for experience

Over the past few weeks I have had several chats with fellow professionals about the value of experience and what to encourage our children to get on their CV.

I am still working on projects for experience for my own newly acquired skills and this never ends if you have a hunger for learning. Whilst we don’t want our children to be exploited there is no getting away from the fact that they do need to do voluntary/community work and preferable within the chosen field of their proposed career.

Recently I met and chatted to somebody from a national charity who agreed volunteers often go on to be offered permanent position. Reverting to the subject of students; they of course need to be able to impress their selected universities that they are right for their course and an excellent candidate for their university.. So that personal statement needs to demonstrate good social skills -remember it’s not just about the exam results.

Please visit Innovate My School’s website and view my articles on tips for writing personal statements and developing social skills:-

http://www.innovatemyschool.com/ideas/item/1617-seven-tips-for-writing-your-personal-statement

http://www.innovatemyschool.com/ideas/developing-social-skills-and-being-community-minded

Finding time

My great mentor and mother always said how one could find the time to do the things we really want to do. How true, sometimes we don’t need to find time but it’s more of a case of making time and as we get into the winter months I am reminded that a lot of elderly people will become housebound and lonely.

If you have elderly relatives make the effort to visit even half an hour of interesting input from somebody younger can put meaning into an otherwise dull day and the time will bring a welcome break into what may be a very long day.

Often the elderly can go several days without seeing anybody and that in itself can be depressing.Finding time to share warm memories and remind our relatives how they still have a place in our lives and that  their memories are important to us to.

Writing memories for the family is something we should encourage these valuable people to do so we can cherish them too long after they are no longer around.

Teenage stress

Any parent of a teenage son or daughter in today’s society is sadly aware of just how stressful life has become for our children. There are so many stress factors facing today’s teens; exams, acceptance from peers and even pressure to try drugs and huge sensitivity surrounding their visual appearance all increased via the use and scrutiny of media.

The pressures for some, certainly outweigh all the great advantages that modern technology bring, indeed those in suypportive roles are also recognising just how disruptive and cruel modern media can be in terms of cyber bullying.

Please read my article on Innovate My School’s website:-

http://www.innovatemyschool.com/industry-expert-articles/item/1670-how-schools-can-tackle-cyberbullying.html

If you have even the smallest inclination that your child may be struggling, then quite likely they are. Ask the question, be supportive and if necessary speak to their school too as the likelihood being the answer may be easier to fathom than you realise and pastoral and tutors can help your family unit turn things around.

Remember our children are only on loan to us and we owe it to them to look out for their well-being even at times when we may not actually like them…we will always love them.

Remind them how proud we are, don’t just say it to others..this gesture of affirmation may just be what they need if feeling vulnerable or concerned about their achievements and remember not everyone can be a great academic.

Dont drive and text!

Today walking across my village in the rain I encountered a brainless selfish female driver. Not only was she the only driver without her lights on her head was down facing texting on her phone.

Fortunately, I was looking where I was going and as I saw her vehicle approach, without lights on, near a dangerous bend, I chose not to cross.

I hope she managed to get home without killing somebody…equally I hope she is caught and given a driving ban this is the only we will stop this madness.

It beggars belief that people feel their phone is more important than safety and the lives of others.

 

The Little Book of Kisses

After a week of emotive blogs I thought I would end the week on a happier and somewhat more light-hearted note.

I am finalising the publishing of my ‘The Little Book of Kisses‘ Kindle project in time for Christmas and ready for Valentine’s 2017.

My very talented nephew Graphics Designer Paul Manning is currently working on the kindle cover…so watch this space.

I will announce as soon as  itbecomes available on Amazon.

Have a good weekend fellow bloggers and followers and…get kissing.