mindfulness

When is the right time?

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I had to confess to a close friend that i was having studying withdrawal symptoms…how sad am I? Seriously, I had given myself a little break from my list of courses to do. I had decided not to start up again until my daughter went back to university. Then today I found myself seeking out one of my proposed courses and starting to read my first lesson…

If I am honest I was concerned the longer I put off starting the worse it would be to get back into my routine. As any fellow mature students will realise one has to be really committed, self-disciplined and motivated to return to studying.

I have to say the past few years I have found gaining various qualifications a positive move and I have really enjoyed the reflective reading and evolving as an individual. Finding the right position to make ultimate use of said qualifications has been harder than I envisaged but I know the right role is out there.

For me of course it was a two prong plan as my counselling qualifications have also given me credence to my serious writing projects, currently with my publisher. One has to be patient as some dreams take longer to chase, catch and become a reality.

Q: So when is the right time? A:Now!!

Remember we are never too old to learn new skills.

 

Women moving forward

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Last week at the Global Woman’s Summit the delegates were privileged to hear many inspirational women give their stories.

During the event we had a live link to Barbara Marx Hubbard in the USA. Barbara spoke about  a  new family on earth and the evolution of women:

‘ Impulse of creativity and love. Each full of potential – a new family of humanity.’

Her tips for the audience included how we should –

‘Catch a vision of a world equal to our potential’.

and…how in life we should all: –

‘Ignore the breaking down but look at what is breaking through.’

Closing with a brilliantly positive statement:-

‘Life’s purpose each of us is more.’

MINDFULNESS

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Being mindful helps us to keep things in perspective and our emotions under control.It is very easy to allow stress to overtake our usual reasoning.

By taking a day at a time and enjoying that day for what it is rather than worrying about the things that may or not even happen tomorrow enables us to lead a far more healthier and positive life.

Too often I talk to colleagues as they approach an important event or something which they have been working towards i.e. giving a presentation or sitting exams and suddenly it all seems so daunting.

The reality being what we tell ourselves we sadly listen to. So the thought for today is to tell yourself you can succeed and not only that you are going to enjoy doing so. Stress…what stress?

I will leave you with one of my Grandmother’s favourite sayings:-

‘If things don’t alter they stay as they are!’

Global Woman Summit 2016

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This weekend I attended the Global Woman Summit with my good friend and journalist Deborah Durbin.  As VIP guests we were treated with great hospitality from the Global Woman team and of course their founder and Editor Mirela Sula who had provided the delegates with an interesting mix of speakers.

Mirela is proactive in encouraging passion and empowerment of women and embracing working together for the greater good. She made every effort to speak personally to the members of the audience and genuinely believes in the value of spirituality.

I found many of the talks quite inspiring but by far the best was the keynote speaker Dr Evin Laszlo a scientist, humanist an amazing author and an ethics prize winner. He applied the theory of quantum physics to how the world needs to change and the place of the cosmic woman (the essence of the summit) in that change.  I could have listened to this brilliant man all day…here are a few gems from my pages of notes:-

He discussed how the system needs to change to gain sustainability, we cannot stay put, or go back but we must go forward and innovate. How it was vital that we regain our coherence with each other. Question: Who best to do that?…Answer: Women!

He feels the next stage of humanity and unconditional love will be through the age of leadership by women. This will be achieved by bringing family and feminine values into the world. He feels that there is no need to conquer but to create oneness.

Dr Laszlo calls the spirit of women the new paradigm.

I will be posting more comments throughout the week to share my experience and words of wisdom from the speakers with my followers.

Have a positive Monday fellow female bloggers and writers

 

 

Supporting our teenagers

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Being a teenager is a very stressful time and this week I have had the privilege of meeting with and working alongside individuals and charities who support the education sector in one way or another with intervention.

Intervention within schools as well as continual professional development of teachers has consistently grown in necessity. The reasons and causes are many and this week personally I have been examining and researching both for a project.

Revision of exams, taking exams and then finally waiting for the results provide months of stress and anxiety for students and parents alike. As I often mention on my blog remember a second choice may well turn out to be a better one for your child.

Yes, we want our children to achieve well in their exams and hopefully get the university of choice and the career of their dreams but we must be ready to support if these do not become a reality.

There are many outward signs that as parents we may be able to see, but there are also those children who hide their feelings from those close to them…so we need to ask.

Communication in life as in business has always been the key to success.

 

Please read my latest piece on Innovate My School’s website:

 

http://www.innovatemyschool.com/ideas/the-true-value-of-cpd

 

Encouraging optimism

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Over the years I have had many a debate with colleagues about my optimistic nature and attitude towards life but I don’t know any other better way do you?

An ex-boyfriend who I sometimes accused of being negative if he threw too much water on my latest dream….would correct me and say he was just a realist.  However, on the other hand he so often congratulated me recognising that I was a great ideas person. He stood back in amazement at how in no time whatsoever I would be talking about a project and then doing it. I guess that can also be described as an ‘I can do’ ethos, maybe a  passion in believing in myself and my abilities to succeed. Then again others would say sounds like sheer madness.

Having said all this, I used to work within a legal environment so I also come from a position of preventative rather than cure… so what may appear to some as an instant decision, I will have been planning for some time and have really agonised about the risks.

So I believe what I am saying is we creative types are not completely crazy you know and more often than not our ideas do come to fruition and often help others in the process.

In life we have to sometimes just run with things and hope beyond even our own wildest dreams that things will work out. If we don’t at least try how will we ever know our own limitations? Being curious is what keeps us interesting after all isn’t it?

I strongly believe that things that are meant to be will be, however we can help our destiny along by being proactive and optimistic rather than sitting around waiting for life to happen and complaining when it doesn’t.

Young at heart

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Part of feeling positive I guess to a certain degree is remaining young at heart. I am known for being sensible and professional when required but also know how to play and have fun.

As my mentor used to say ‘laughing is as good as a tonic’, same said lady was an expert at playing the yo yo. She could do all sorts of tricks and we were always buying her new ones and ones that lit up.

Last week I treated myself to a new wooden yo yo and had great fun last night playing with it much to the amusement of my daughter! It’s almost as much fun as blow bubbles.

Seriously, taking time out to just be and enjoy simple things in life can place us back in the moment  remembering halcyon times as a child… and, for a while, forget about whatever is troubling us.

As for the troubles…these too will pass.

I know it’s Monday but find time to smile and enjoy the day whatever it brings.

Life is… Absolutely Fabulous

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Life is as good as you make it according to my amazing mother and mentor. It is of course absolutely fabulous to those of a positive nature but not so good for those that struggle with depression.

I had a very interesting chat with a psychology student yesterday who had completed her first year and discussed with me the effects that having a mental illness has. She used a great example of how when one has a broken leg everyone can see the problem and how a child may be given longer to get around the school premises. However, a student that may be suffering from anxiety and feeling intimidated in a busy school environment will not be afforded such concessions.

I also remember my daughter coming home from school with the famous ‘plant drawing’ showing visibly what we see above and what is hidden below the surface. Reminding us all and, simply so, that people may be suffering in silence.

Thankfully mental illness and depression have started to get more media coverage and awareness.

The best any of us can do is to ask how somebody is and bear in mind things may actually  not be ‘fine’. Generally we know our friends and family well albeit many people are good at hiding their feelings…if you think something may be troubling them offer the opportunity to talk and share.

If you could do with a giggle and a lift of spirits you could do a lot worse than see the new Ab Fab film..we all are guilty of taking life too seriously and as my mentor used to say:-.

‘A laugh is as good as a tonic’  (without the Gin)

There was a great line delivered by Jennifer Saunder’s character who referred to be ‘doing mindlessness’  Brilliant!

 

 

Mindfulness

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Adopting the theory of mindfulness within CBT as believed and practiced by Buddhists is about learning to live positively in the moment. Making every day count and not living by dwelling on past negative experiences and/or living in fear of what terrible fate awaits one in the future but focusing on the here and now. Half of our deep seated worries will never come to fruition and the other half ….do not actually exist!

One can be aware of something without the necessity of allowing it to become all consuming, but opt to moving on to the next thought process to dilute its importance.  Standing back, reflecting, accepting and thinking ‘In the scheme of things’ one could soon realise the concerned thought is in fact trivia and not worthy of the time and mind space or level of anxiety.

A modern day professor of philosophy Morrie Schwartz was a great advocate of this within his teachings. The script from the film ‘Tuesday’s with Morrie’ dramatizing his final months of his life provides excellent material for anybody studying the subject of counselling/theology. Morrie said: ‘You cannot spare somebody’s feelings by denying them, but forgive now –that’s the tension of opposites –we learn from what hurts us as much as what loves us.’ 

He spoke of being mindful: ‘The Buddhists believe that one should speak to the little imaginary bird sitting on one’s shoulder and ask everyday ‘Am I leading the life I want to live?’ Which I believe to be an excellent way of putting on the breaks and reminding us that life is short and each day should be treasured and enjoyed for what it brings as part of life’s rich tapestry.

Live a day at a time and live it well.

Being grateful

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I think we all take our health and mobility for granted. It’s not until we suffer an injury or maybe have to care for a loved one who may suddenly become ill that we realise how much our life and freedom relies on being fit and healthy.

I often write about the affects a stroke has both physically and emotionally and how the loss of use of a limb whether temporary or permanent is in some ways like a mini bereavement.

Sometimes the simplest of injuries can render us incapable of achieving everyday simple tasks and as frustrating as that can be we must spare a thought for those people who are coping with incredible challenges every day all their lives.

Yesterday I went to to see the film ‘Me before you’ it is a beautiful film which really does make one think just how we do take our lives and abilities for granted. It also bravely and sensitively dealt with the right to choose to die. There wasn’t a dry eye in the cinema.

In life it really is about living our life a day at a time and making it count by being the best we can. Moreover trying not to take anything for granted.