happiness

Chocolate week

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We are frequently being told that a certain day or week is for celebrating or increasing awareness for one charity or cause…this week I am informed it is Chocolate Week.

I am personally aware how good chocolate is good in terms of feeling good but as a wise woman once told me ‘all things in moderation’.

However, I know when i was very ill many years ago a hospital ‘expert’ told me chocolate was good for me…I knew that! Joking aside we know that it is a mood enhancer and a quick energy boost but ensure the cocoa content is high and the fat low!

Enjoy the indulgence but balance it out with a bit of exercise…maybe a walk to the sweet shop.

 

Family love

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Nothing stronger than the bonds of a parent and a child and in our family that extends to aunties too. We are a spiritual lot in our family and when one of my nieces was  in labour a few years back I spent a rather unsettled morning and felt very in tune with said expectant mother…we joked about this today with her reminding me she had it far worse.

Seriously though we had another arrival this week, on Thursday evening around eleven I was tired and took myself off to bed but just couldn’t get settled and ended up coming down stairs, making tea and mooching around watching bad TV until nearly five.  What I didn’t know is my sister was also doing exactly the same at the same time.

What you may ask curiously was causing this sleepless agitated night in the family…My Nephew and Godson’s wife went into labour at eleven and our latest arrival put in an appearance Friday morning.

We are all thrilled to welcome another dolly into the family…the next generation and I wish my great niece a long, healthy and exciting life which I will enjoy observing.

Thanks to those angels who watched over our lovely new mum giving a safe delivery and a beautiful daughter.

Birthdays

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Lordy another birthday and I have posted on a facebook birthday wish that I am getting older and wider. It’s the truth.

I am so fortunate to have such lovely friends and family who have been spoiling me all week. My house looks like a florist, more chocolate yum… but my best gift is my lovely daughter home for a girly day.

We may have more than one reason to celebrate family baby due and it would be grand if she (I think it’s a she) or he makes an appearance today.

Those that know me also know its a bittersweet day for our family and I am mindful that whilst it’s got easier.. we all still think of my wonderful mum, not just this day but everyday.

Love, support and cherish those you hold dear.

 

Finding time to relax

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Life is one continual rush for most people  I meet and finding time for one’s self is so often put to the end of the list. It is not a crime to want mind space for yourself or to take time out to do something you enjoy.

I have been recovering from rather painful tooth abscess and extraction and was pleased to receive a great gift in the post. An adult colouring book!! I know I have teased many female friends and family members for indulging in this trend the past year or so…but I am now hooked.

For my screen break yesterday I coloured in a few very fine cats using my lovely coloured pencils bought for me by my daughter and it was a very calming and enjoyable session.My book also had little cat poems and thought provoking quotes.

I am currently working with and researching ways to help various clients in stroke recovery and/or dementia sufferers and I will be using this creative relaxer alongside my other sensory and reminiscence writing work.

So whether it be colouring in, listening to music of reading that book…just do it. Don’t feel guilty and be like me go the whole hog and eat a crunchie bar too.

Happy weekend fellow bloggers and followers.

Visiting nursing homes

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I know a lot of families are faced with having to make the difficult decision of selecting the next sensible move for their elderly relatives. This may result in having to find the right nursing home which can seem very daunting.

I won’t turn today’s blog into an advice article but recently I was asked to visit a number of nursing homes with a friend who is faced with the dilemma of choosing somewhere suitable for a relative. The ultimate decision, where possible should of course involve the wishes and hopefully a visit beforehand by the proposed resident.

I have to say the three I visited were all very different but I was pleasantly surprised how welcome we were made and how staff made every effort to answer all my questions. It’s a really good idea to have somebody with you that is not so emotionally involved and able to be focused and objective.

I know some people are put off by the larger more modern homes but I was very impressed with the few I have visited the past year for one reason or another. The buildings are purpose built with superb en suite facilities and one even had a treatment room for the ladies to have their hair done and proper facilities for visiting chiropodist. These may seem unimportant facilities but they matter for those who will be unable to get out and about. New residents are properly assessed to ensure they receive the necessary support which may be dementia or stroke rehab related.

I have also been impressed by the many activities which are available to residents even in the smaller homes including sensory and reminiscence work. The sad picture some people may have in their minds of unhappy elderly folk sitting in a circle being ignored is far from the truth. Through my research I met some really dedicated and well-trained staff who genuinely care about the well-being of their residents and make every effort to bond with families too.

My tip is to visit as many as possible in your chosen area and don’t leave it until the last minute. As difficult as it is to talk about this with you relatives…please please do so and ensure you fully involve them. It is a well-known fact that parents do not want to feel a burden to their children and they will certainly try to hide just how vulnerable they feel.

My closing comment came from a manager at a very homely place who said she does everything she can to reassure her residents they are not a burden!

‘I remind them without them I wouldn’t have such a lovely job.’

 

 

A Father’s Love

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I am having my screen break today and listening to a beautiful CD ‘A Father’s Love‘ a wonderful surprise gift today which arrived in the lunchtime post.

Close friends and followers know I have been working on a my own book:

‘Dancing in my dreams’ for many years about the love and loss of my own father and the words to the tracks on this album are so poignant to me.

Oddly enough only last night I was discussing the subject of not having a father with a friend and how Father-daughter relationships (or lack of them)  affects many girls relationships throughout their life.

I think Fathers often under-estimate the impact their relationship has on their children, Mothers may keep the home and wipe away the tears more often than not but children need their Fathers input and love too. This cannot be measured in time spent but the quality of that time and the intensity of that love and as we know some men are better at demonstrating that love than others.

I only had seven years with my own Father, who died from a massive stroke hence my on-going campaign to support stroke charities and increase awareness. My memories are few but treasured oh so dearly.

Thank you that man for the random act of kindness.

 

 

Tea drinking

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Most people that know me well know that I do like a cup of tea. Don’t give me builders but a good strong cup of earl grey and I am a happy bunny whatever time of the day it is.

Yesterday i visited a local new tea shop where one can purchase any flavour you can imagine…I chose a caramel chocolate nut option. It was nice for a change but….

Today I heard a brilliant phrase concerning tea from a Scottish female friend:

‘Yer Man’s yer man…but your tea’s your comfort.’ 

That made me smile, I know my mum’s solution was to have a cup of tea and share a problem (her phrase being ‘my tea pot’s always warm‘)

A cup of tea works for me and most of my visiting friends whatever the problem is needing aired and shared!

I have just come in from a hot walk and yes, that’s right am settled with a cup of tea..oh and who bought that pecan nut danish pastry?? Better eat it whilst it’s fresh.

New chapters

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September sees the start of new chapters for many children, some may be just starting full time school with many tears from mums wondering where the years have gone to. Whilst others may be starting a bigger adventure and a more serious chapter as they head off for their first term at university with mums being equally proud and tearful…wondering where the years have gone to!

I am reminded as I write my blog tonight of the song our children used to sing in the Infants School: ‘One more step along the road I go’…one that my own mother used to sing to me and always makes me choke back the tears.

Whatever steps be it small or large your children are taking this week, as mothers we have to learn to let go, encourage our children to be confident and positive and embrace what life holds in store.Yes there will be tears but moments ahead where we will be oh so proud of what they achieve.

I know a lot of people find it hard to cope with the empty nest but this is often a time for reflection and to perhaps start something new for yourself. A new chapter of your own.

Remember the university children come back and appreciate us all the more!

Good luck to all those accepting new challenges this month.Enjoy!

 

Finding what works

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In whatever our chosen career may be we are never too old to benefit from the advice of others. What is great, don’t you agree, is when we take time to research a subject and find out ways we can improve our own delivery of what we do…and find out it works!

I am a great believer in being informed to help make a better decision and/or give me that edge or some may say the confidence to go that extra mile to please my clients. I am mindful that people often put their faith in us and our abilities so continual professional development is vital.

There is nothing better than receiving feedback that how you handled a situation was really appreciated by those concerned. It never hurts to say thank you, though in some areas of my work I can tell if the client has enjoyed and benefited from my help.

It’s a good feeling to be helping those that need encouragement and engagement and it may be far simpler than those around may fear. Don’t be afraid to ask for help for yourself or your loved ones as the right assistance may be easier than you imagine and make such a difference.

Communication continues to be the key to success.

 

A new life

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There is nothing to match the arrival of a new life in one’s family unit. For those we love we pray for a safe delivery and that mum and baby are both fine. Once we know for certain that Mum is Ok and the new baby is healthy we then enjoy the excitement and beauty of that new miracle of life.

This is one occasion when I thank the modern technology for enabling me to see a photo of my adorable great nephew just half an hour after making his grand entrance.

I always was a ‘great auntie’ to my nieces and nephews but the last few years I have also been a ‘Great Aunt’! Now I know I am old.

And… as always, I will say how my wonderful mother would have loved this new generation – I look at them and imagine what the future holds for them something special I suspect.

As I have got older I understand why Mum used to go to church and thank God for any safe delivery of grandchildren born, I did my thanks last night too.